30 triple plus

30 triple plus... that amounts to 34 dollars 20 cents for a bucket of beer. And a lot of fun with friends. Maybe it is true... I am turning alcoholic again. Maybe its also true, I never could do what I enjoyed with friends in the past... I admitted to them last night, I neglected them. And for once in a long time, I felt freed.

Sometimes, we keep secrets to ourselves... maybe we do it sub-consciously, maybe we know what we have something kept in our minds. Some people believe they can keep their secrets in their hearts forever. I don't believe that. Because I know I will go mad and I would be angry at myself and others.

Some can remain in their shadows forever. I don't think I can... thats why I still live in guilt shown through my emotions and moods. Maybe I can never forgive myself. But I am grateful to be back in the company of friends. For now, that is all I ask for. Friends and beer haha.

I am not blind to wickness
but I am deaf to kindness