I admit... I did and said the worst things to her... but I also admit... I have been lying not to her only but to myself. And for this I suffer a fate worst then death. I miss her, I do.
I believe people lie... they do... but I also believe a person's lies or actions are not a way to judge him/her... it is his/her's intentions I believe that speak the character of one's self...
I suffer from such a crime. Mish, I lied to you when I told you I wanted to break up and ask you to move on. It made you sad, cry and lost for a period of time. That is a painful regret I have to live with today ... because I never intended for that. You ask yourself ... Is that person who broke up with you the real Leon who loves you and put you in all aspects of his life? only you will know the answer.
I am sorry I had to break your heart... I just don't know how to tell you the truth hidden in me. And when i wanted to tell you the truth... it was too late. Maybe I didn't know I took too long. Maybe I didn't realize I would hurt you more then help you. Maybe I was wrong to lie to you, in order for you to be happier. But I know the truth... I just didn't say... I wanted you to be happy but because I was confused, worried and frightened I would waste your time and youth ... thats why I lied to let you go.
I had to lied because I cared too much for you. That is the truth. The truth is also the one thing that keeps this idiot very much alive ... waiting for the girl that he loves the most.
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